9.07.2005

In the end...only kindess matters

I am heartbroken.
I want to do more.
I cry all the time.
I hate the news.
I hate what hasn't been done.
I hate that people have lost everything they worked so hard to get.
I hate that people lost their mothers, their brothers, their children.
I hate that I can't give millions.
I hate that I don't have a big house to accomadate lots of families.
I hate that this hit me harder than 9/11.
I hate that there very well could be a class/race issue involved.
I hate that we are killing people in Iraq, but aren't saving people in America.
I hate Katrina.

I heard this older song by Jewel on the radio about 20 minutes ago...As usual, I started crying...This sums up how i feel PERFECTLY. I am overcome with sadness right now. I really and truly am. But we can beat this, and we will be better because of it.


Hands
If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we're all OK
And not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I won't be made useless
I won't be idle with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear
My hands are small, I know But they re not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
Poverty stole your golden shoes
It didn't steal your laughter
And heartache came to visit me
But I knew it wasn't ever after
We'll fight, not out of spite
For someone must stand up for what's right
'Cause where there's a man who has no voice
There ours shall go singing
My hands are small I know But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
I am never broken
In the end only kindness matters
In the end only kindness matters
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
My hands are small I know But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
We are never broken
We are Gods eyes Gods hands Gods mind
We are Gods eyes Gods hands God's heart
We are God's eyes God's hands God's eyes
We are God's hands We are God's hands

12 people took the time to say:

g said...

oh sweetheart.
you know i feel 1000000000% the same. hold on to these lyrics:

... not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful/ And useless in times like these/ I won't be made useless/ I won't be idle with despair/ I will gather myself around my faith/ For light does the darkness most fear...

be a light. and know what you CAN do. and that every little thing helps... so much love to you.

Meghan said...

I feel you on this, Ashley. My heart is heavy for the victims and their families and no one can ever write more beautifully about horrible things than you.

jocelynneb@comcast.net said...

Jewel has been my fave for so long, she has such a talent for getting the words just right. I'm glad for the people that have the words when I have none.

Mary said...

all i can say, is it's just bad... we were without power, water and phone for a week but we still have a home and jobs. no one in my family was hurt.... we do have a gas and food shortage in our town now.... a bread truck was highjacked. the gas trucks are having to be police escorted and you risk the chance of having your throat sliced at the gas pump. houses are getting broken into, purses are getting snagged. we have a lot of people here in our town (Meridian, Ms.) from New Orleans and the Ms. coast. we are doing what we can to help. it's bad and some people are just making it worse. Just pray for everyone...at a time when everyone should come together and help each other, seems like some of them are just going crazy. so glad to be back in touch with the blog world and the pea world.... 7 days seemed like a long, long time. You have such a wonderful way with words and paper! Thanks for all you do!
Mary (harleypea)

Sarah said...

sigh.
amen.

April said...

i hate it too...its horrible. but do what you can...every bit helps. just think all the good that would come if everyone donated!

and it hits me harder than 9/11 too.

xoxo

Shannon said...

I'm right there with ya Ashley. I wish I could do more too.

christina said...

i feel exactly the same...it really has been so,so sad watching the news...it really makes you grateful for the things you have...and not too complain about the little things all the time! :)

Jen said...

I know what you're feeling, I feel it too. That song just sums it up.

genevieve said...

sniff sniff girl and big fat hugs and sloppy kisses for you these dark days. you have a huge heart and beautiful soul...

tRicia said...

i hear ya girl. i finally just turned the tv off. i've removed myself from it, ya know? but then i feel guilty for stepping away, and being thankful that i can.

tara said...

if that song isn't perfect i don't know what is. this katrina has hit me hard too. not sure why compared to 9/11 but it has.....maybe because someone and it's more personal for me . or maybe because each time something catastrophic happens it gets harder. not sure. i just know i have been crying for a damn week. and now i just want to adopt one of those poor misplaced children. or sponsor a family. i wish i had millions. i wish alot of things. but right now i have victoria and she's here in my home and she's safe. and happy. she wants to live with me. LOL. even though i am just watching her here and there when her parents need me.....she is so CUTE!
tara